Change is Not the Enemy

Let’s talk about change.

Not the strategic roadmap version of it, or the sanitized bullet points in a PowerPoint deck. I mean real, messy, uncomfortable change—the kind that stirs up feelings, disrupts routines, and makes people clutch their coffee cups a little tighter in morning meetings.

Here’s the thing: we all know change is constant. And yet, when it shows up—a new system launches, a reorg is announced, or the “way we’ve always done it” is up for debate—our gut reaction is often to resist.

Why is that?

At the heart of our discomfort is the feeling of not being in control. (Any other “control enthusiasts” out there?!). Even if we didn’t love the old way, at least we understood it – and our place in it. The predictability brought comfort. Change, on the other hand, forces us into unknown territory—and that triggers fear, loss, and sometimes a sneaky little emotion we rarely admit in the workplace: grief.

Grief? Yes. Grief over a role in which we once had more clarity. Grief over lost status. Grief over norms that suddenly vanish in the name of “efficiency.”

Even welcomed changes can be stressful. The uncertainty combined with real or perceived risks can be daunting. It is natural to experience resistance – often in the forms of avoidance, worry, delayed decision-making, and giving into negativity biases. We may hunger for such absolute reassurance of choosing the “right” path that it puts us into an analysis paralysis.

Left unchecked, resistance can lead to frustration, communication breakdowns, credibility issues, relationship struggles, energy suck, and stagnation.

But here’s the opportunity: what if, instead of reacting from fear, we responded with curiosity?

This is where becoming a change agent comes in. Not necessarily in title, but in mindset. Change agents don’t wait to be convinced—they get curious. They ask questions like: “What’s possible now that wasn’t before?” or “What do we want to create together?”

Being a change agent doesn’t mean pretending change is easy. It means acknowledging the discomfort and choosing to engage anyway. It means advocating for context, compassion, and communication—because people don’t resist change as much as they resist being changed without their input.

Leaders with a healthy relationship to change find they can make better and more timely decisions, have a bias for action, and know how to inspire others. They also can identify when it is time to shift gears (neither too soon or too slowly), with an understanding of when their team’s groove has gone into autopilot and morphed into a rut of inertia.

You may not consider yourself an agent of change, but if you are a leader, you set the tone. If you tend to be cautious around change, be transparent about your assessment of a situation and invite others to make their case. If you tend to make change too rapidly – or fail to bring your team along – you could benefit from slowing down and providing the business case so that you don’t fall victim to, “ready, fire, aim”.

Change leadership means creating clarity, reducing fear, and empowering action.

Leaders who embrace change as a natural phenomenon create a culture of initiative-taking, possibility thinking, problem-solving, and innovation. This is not change for the sake of change but change with purpose – aligned with the organization’s vision and goals, designed to grow the next generation of leaders, and tuned into the evolution of the industry and shifts in the market.

So how do you build this kind of mindset?

In my resiliency workshops, we talk a lot about adopting a growth mindset as a way to navigate new situations, challenges, or life’s curve balls.

Notice your own resistance. What is it trying to protect? Then move to empathy – for yourself and others. Your coworkers aren’t being “difficult”—they’re navigating uncertainty just like you. Listen more. Validate concerns. Create space for people to process.

Take action. Even small moves matter. Be the person who translates ambiguity into enthusiasm. Offer solutions. Connect dots. Celebrate wins, even the tiny ones. And when things go sideways—and they will—lead with honesty and accountability, not spin.

Making the Case for Change

In Jim Collins’ book, “Good to Great”, he argues that the problem with “good companies” is that they get complacent. Done thoughtfully, change can give you a competitive advantage and revive lethargic cultures. It can propel teams away from tolerating mediocracy and light a fire for growth. Done poorly, and it can simply be disruptive and chaotic. Think, “squirrel” or “flavor of the month”. The common response I hear from long-term employees in these workplaces? They choose to take no action and tell newcomers, “this too shall pass”.

Building trust during times of change is one of the most critical responsibilities of a leader. An effective way to do that is to be transparent, sit with the messiness of it, model adaptability, and rally others forward.

Because here’s the truth: change is rarely a solo sport. It’s collective. Cultural. Cumulative. The more we embrace that, the more resilient, creative, and aligned our organizations become.

How do you do change?

Whatever your relationship is to change – resist it, embrace it, begrudgingly accept it, or actively seek it out – it is an inevitable force in our workplaces.

Most people have a complex relationship to change. We can desire it while actively resisting it.  We can energetically seek it out only to not be satisfied with it once we get it – feeling perpetually restless. We may avoid it unconsciously with statements like, “we’ve tried that before” or “nothing’s going to change”. Perhaps you are totally comfortable with the idea others changing!

So, let’s reframe our relationship to change. It’s not just something to endure—it’s something to shape.

And maybe—just maybe— change is not the enemy; it is merely an invitation to evolve.

What change are you ready to champion?

From Critic to Critical Thinker

As a business therapist, my job is to help untangle the complexity of human dynamics in the work world. In this attempt at sense-making, I sometimes stumble upon an insight or perspective that feeds into a societal norm or trend. Here is what I am noticing …

We are conflating the act of criticizing (ourselves and others), with the skill of critical thinking.

In a series of recent training sessions, I explored with my client the ways in which we use criticism of ourselves as a carrot and stick mechanism for self-improvement. In other words, in the name of personal growth, we beat ourselves up. In the name of feeling better about ourselves, we cast judgment onto others, allowing the faults we perceive of theirs to elevate the perception we have of ourselves. Being critical in this fashion is often shame-inducing, which generally ignites feelings of defensiveness. These acts of criticism ultimately drain our energy and deteriorate our relationships.

Most of us like to think we are critical thinkers, just like we all like to think we are good drivers! And yet, the constant media/information vortex in which we find ourselves diminishes our critical thinking skills. If you are going to have a story, data, report, or social media post influence your way of thinking, what you believe to be true, and decisions you make in your life, you’ll want to trust that the interpretation has gone through some rigor.

As a self-proclaimed word geek, I had to do a little etymological digging.  The word “critical” can mean:

1. Judging severely and finding fault.

2. Reflecting careful analysis and judgment.

3. A turning point; crucial or decisive.

4. Being in, or on the verge of, a state of crisis or emergency.

We are strengthening our capacity to be armchair critics (judging severely and finding fault), while losing our capacity to think critically (reflecting careful analysis). If we operate as if everything is critical (state of crisis), we are perpetuating an unhealthy sense of urgency and feeding drama. If, on the other hand, we practice an astute way of perceiving the world, we may bring a critical eye that illuminates a truer reality.

Critical thinking is the ability to analyze information objectively – weeding out the biases, the inaccuracies, questioning assumptions, and assessing the reliability of sources. Critical thinking isn’t about being constantly negative or critical of everything. It is not meant as a copout to naysay change or validate resistance and remain stuck in one’s views. It’s about having an open, inquisitive mind that values the discovery process. It is about arriving at your own carefully considered conclusions instead of taking information at face value – and being able to shift your thinking when presented with new compelling data. It’s a nimble state of mind that affords you better decision-making and problem-solving.

Thinking critically can also help you see waste in workflows and innovate for better results because you have trained your brain to productively challenge the status quo, sometimes with the simple question of, “Why …”? Why do we do it this way? Coupled with curiosity and enthusiasm, the critical thinker can inspire fresh ideas and collaborative efforts for continuous improvement.

 Demonstrating your capacity to think clearly and integrate facts builds your credibility. Here are a few questions you can explore to help you stay vigilant:

• Is this information complete and up to date?

• What evidence is being presented to support the argument?

• Whose voice is missing here?

• Is the source trustworthy?

• Are there sweeping generalizations or absolutes being made?

• Can you distinguish between opinions, beliefs, and hard data?

• Can you name your own biases on this topic?

• Are you attached to your version of the story?

• Are you invested in proving “them” wrong or in finding the truth?

• Are you seeking validation for what you already know?

• Is the argument emotionally charged?

While critical thinking emphasizes logical reasoning, it does not need to do so at the exclusion of emotional intelligence. In fact, high EQ is essential in checking ourselves! Strong emotions can be amazing fuel for action, and they can cloud one’s perspective, fueling a stubborn attachment to a certain way of thinking.

Organizational psychologist Adam Grant offers this advice on how to be a better critical thinker:

1.     Be 10% more skeptical of people you agree with – and 10% more charitable to people you disagree with

2.     Look for flaws in ideas you like – and strengths in arguments you dislike.

3.     Discount sources that always trumpet the same narrative- and learn from those that engage with competing ideas.

Embracing this mental acuity is an opportunity to move from being critical to elevating our intellect. Yet, it isn’t just about becoming smarter or more effective. It’s a way to engage in the kind of dialogue that invites a real exchange of ideas. In doing so, we prioritize our relationships, because in the spirit of critical thinking we ask good, open-ended questions and listen intently. In this vein, even when we disagree, we will have a deeper understanding of motivations and reasons, rather than righteous indignation.

The human side of business is often complex and messy, yet it is the heart and soul of our work. Let’s show our colleagues the care and respect they deserve, and that we want for ourselves. Collectively, we can change the tone of our personal and professional discourse.

We don’t have to be critical, to think critically.

Seeking to elevate your impact in 2025?

In preparation for the new year, you may have reflected on how you want to advance your organization, your team, or your own leadership effectiveness. The beginning of a new year is a natural time for fresh starts – and behavioral science research shows that the “fresh start effect” can bring momentum to our efforts.

This is the time of year we usually define goals, shape priorities, connect accountabilities to initiatives, and generally finalize game plans. Clarity of direction is a powerful element in a leader’s repertoire. How else can people follow you if they don’t understand where you are going? Articulating goals puts your expectations in motion. Yet, inspiring sustained effort beyond the new year launch will take more than a well-thought-out strategy.

Unlock your ability to communicate, and you unlock your potential to lead.

Whatever your hopes for 2025, your capacity to achieve them might lie in your ability to clearly and compellingly communicate.

Communication is more than directing your team on the organization’s direction and goals. It’s more than offering valuable feedback, or keeping people informed, or even listening to colleagues’ new ideas (although all of those are essential). Communicating is more than getting our message across, it’s about making a connection. Communications guru Vinh Giang says, “If you want to influence people, it is not just our words, it is in the generosity of energy we give people.”

We all have an “emotional wake” that ripples out from us. Leaders especially so, as they set the tone for the cultural norms. That doesn’t translate into being overly responsible for others, rather owning how we show up and the impact we can have. Likely, you are not fully aware of the impact you have on others. In fact, sometimes we unintentionally create the very opposite desired effect!

Cue mindful leadership.

Each new year I begin with a theme to set my intentions. This year’s word: agency. It’s the capacity to influence my own thoughts and behavior; exercising autonomy in the choices I make, the things I do, and how I go about life. It’s personal accountability in action. I’ve discovered it is easier to embrace a sense of agency when I practice mindfulness. Only then do I have the level of consciousness to be aware of my patterns and direct my energies to align with what I want to experience.

Mindful leadership has the potential to reduce workplace stress, find new ways to solve problems, improve collaboration, promote adaptability to change, and increase creative contribution.

Mindful leaders bring an awareness to their surroundings, a keen observation of dynamics; they notice moods and shifts in energy, and they can sense disengagement in the moment. They pick up on nuances of body language and find entry points to engage even the most reserved. They are skilled in the art of being present and paying attention.

Couple all that with caring, and you have a leader who knows how to connect and inspire! Now what you have to say has more importance because you have invested in creating an honest and open space of belonging.

But first, you will want to hone those observation skills to develop self-awareness. You will have more credibility if you are able to honestly assess your own strengths, weaknesses, and emotional triggers. Notice the emotions that arise when you are in a difficult conversation with a colleague. Do you shut down? Raise your voice? Make them wrong? Become more authoritarian? Push your opinion as the only right one? A mindful leader takes a moment to breathe, assess the situation, and respond thoughtfully instead of reacting emotionally.

If you become known as a leader who makes thoughtful, balanced decisions aligned with core values and long-term goals, you will bring a steadiness and trustworthiness to your organization. Mindfulness brings clarity, focus, and calmness.

New leaders - notice when you are spending too much time and energy proving yourself, advocating stubbornly for your position or defaulting to the power of your position rather than the strength of the relationship. Allow space in a conversation for the dialogue to be organic; a flow that relinquishes control of the outcome. You can still be passionate about the issues, while being clued into what is happening for others. Bringing an empathetic ear might bring the shift needed to reduce friction and find common ground. We all want and deserve to be seen and heard.

Your leadership responsibility is helping those around you achieve their highest potential. If you master the skills of noticing and being curious about the people in your sphere of influence, you will send a message that they matter. In doing so, you are inviting them to bring their full and best selves to the work at hand.

This level of engagement fosters the kind of meaningful conversations that meet people where they are, discovering their unique value and motivations. Your capacity to elevate your impact begins with the simple act of paying attention with the intent to connect and cultivate. The results will follow. May 2025 be a mindfully led, potential-unlocked, and agency-infused year!